And a Hiei Stuck up in a Tree
by Godrina-Drowning-in-Blood
Summary: You know I can just jump down, right? -It's a popular Christmas song, with a YYH twist. Previously called Twelve Days of Demons. Flames will be used to burn down my school. It's better then it sounds, R&R PLZ!


Twelve days of Bashingness- By Godrina-of-the-Shadows  
  
-Disclaimer: I do NOT own Yu-Yu Hakusho. If I did, Hiei would be the main character!  
  
-Oh yeah, and if anybody else did something similar to this, I did NOT steal your idea! I'm really sensitive about plagiarism and stuff.  
  
-There is some, erm, colorful language in this...  
  
-Kuwabara bashing...uh, sorry. He's not so bad, but I needed somebody to bash. If you like Kuwabara, go read my fic called "She Chose Me?" where he proposes to Yukina.  
  
-Special Thanks: Kitsune of Light-Lisa, thanks for all the help w/this fic! And Crystal Jaganshi, aka Crystal Minomino-Crystal, YOU ARE SO COOL! THANK YOU FOR PUTTING UP WITH ME! XD, Nicole-YOU'RE PSYCHO BUT YOU'RE COOL!  
  
~*~  
  
-On the first day of Christmas, my true love (HIEI! XD) gave to me:  
  
A Hiei stuck up in a tree.  
  
Hiei: hn.  
  
-On the second day of Christmas, my true love gave to me:  
  
Two rose whips,  
  
and a Hiei stuck up in a tree.  
  
Hiei: baka ningen. Let me down!  
  
-On the third day of Christmas, my true love gave to me:  
  
Three Keikos slapping,  
  
Two rose whips,  
  
and a Hiei stuck up in a tree.  
  
Keiko: *slaps Yusuke* YOU BASTARD!  
  
-On the fourth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me:  
  
Four thieving demons,  
  
Three Keikos slapping,  
  
Two rose whips,  
  
and a Hiei stuck up in a tree.  
  
Kuronue: Hello, Hiei.  
  
Hiei: LET ME DOWN!  
  
-On the fifth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me:  
  
Five shot gun blasts,  
  
Four thieving demons,  
  
Three Keikos slapping,  
  
Two rose whips,  
  
and a Hiei stuck up in a tree.  
  
Hiei: *takes one of the rosewhips*  
  
Kuronue: what the hell are you doing, Hiei?  
  
Hiei: I've been in this tree for five frickin days! I'm going to get down! *chops off the branch that he is standing on, and falls to the ground*  
  
Yusuke: aren't you going to be back up there next verse?  
  
Hiei: no.  
  
-On the sixth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me:  
  
Six swords a slicing,  
  
Five shot gun blasts,  
  
Four thieving demons,  
  
Three Keikos slapping,  
  
Two rose whips,  
  
and a Hiei stuck up in a tree.  
  
Hiei: HOLY FUCK MONKEYS! HOW'D I GET BACK UP HERE?!?!?  
  
Keiko: watch your language!  
  
Youko: *makes the tree grow taller*  
  
Hiei: DAMN YOU KURAMA!  
  
Keiko: how'd you get here?  
  
Youko: it says FOUR thieving demons.  
  
Keiko: ooooooooooooooooooooooooh.  
  
-On the seventh day of Christmas, my true love gave to me:  
  
Seven cities a burning,  
  
Six swords a slicing,  
  
Five shot gun blasts,  
  
Four thieving demons,  
  
Three Keikos slapping,  
  
Two rose whips,  
  
and a Hiei stuck up in a tree.  
  
Hiei: *takes one of the swords a slicing and chops down the tree* I WILL NOT BE PUT BACK UP THERE!  
  
Yusuke: I LOVE THIS! I HAVE UNLIMITED BULLETS!  
  
Keiko: *slaps Yusuke*  
  
Yusuke: WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT FOR?!?!?  
  
Keiko: you're a jerk.  
  
Yusuke: *gives her chibi eyes, (like he did to those guys right after he came back and was all happy about being alive) and smiles* I didn't know you cared!  
  
Youko and Kuronue: *sweatdropping*  
  
-On the eighth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me:  
  
Eight bakas a teasing,  
  
Seven cities a burning,  
  
Six swords a slicing,  
  
Five shot gun blasts,  
  
Four thieving demons,  
  
Three Keikos slapping,  
  
Two rose whips,  
  
and a Hiei stuck up in a tree.  
  
Hiei: You know I can just jump down, right?  
  
Kuwabara: HEY SHORTY! YOU'RE A WIMP AND I COULD TAKE YOU ON ANY DAY!  
  
Hiei: hn. Did you even know the authoress called you a baka?  
  
Kuwabara: OF COURSE I KNEW! She did?  
  
Everyone but Kuwabara: *nods*  
  
Hiei: hn. baka.  
  
-On the ninth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me:  
  
Nine killer plants,  
  
Eight bakas a teasing,  
  
Seven cities a burning,  
  
Six swords a slicing,  
  
Five shot gun blasts,  
  
Four thieving demons,  
  
Three Keikos slapping,  
  
Two rose whips,  
  
and a Hiei stuck up in a tree.  
  
Kuwabara: I AM NOT A BAKA!  
  
Yusuke: just drop it, willya?  
  
Kuwabara: NO WAY! SHORTY CALLED ME A BAKA!  
  
Yusuke: look, baka, I just did too.  
  
Kuwabara: OH I AM GONNA POUND YOUR SORRY ASS INTO THE GROUND SO HARD...!  
  
Yusuke: I'D LIKE TO SEE YOU TRY!  
  
Keiko: *slaps them*  
  
Kuwabara and Yusuke: @_@  
  
-On the tenth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me:  
  
Ten bombs a blowing,  
  
Nine killer plants,  
  
Eight bakas a teasing,  
  
Seven cities a burning,  
  
Six swords a slicing,  
  
Five shot gun blasts,  
  
Four thieving demons,  
  
Three Keikos slapping,  
  
Two rose whips,  
  
and a Hiei stuck up in a tree.  
  
Karasu: Hello, Kurama.  
  
Youko: O_O OH NO NOT YOU! *runs for his life*  
  
Hiei: *is asleep in the tree*  
  
Karasu: COME BACK! *runs off after Youko*  
  
Killer Plant: *eats Kuwabara*  
  
Kuwabara: AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!  
  
-On the eleventh day of Christmas, my true love gave to me:  
  
Eleven sarcastic psychics,  
  
Ten bombs a blowing,  
  
Nine killer plants,  
  
Eight bakas a teasing,  
  
Seven cities a burning,  
  
Six swords a slicing,  
  
Five shot gun blasts,  
  
Four thieving demons,  
  
Three Keikos slapping,  
  
Two rose whips,  
  
and a Hiei stuck up in a tree.  
  
Kuronue: *is asleep*  
  
Hiei: *is asleep*  
  
Kuwabara: *is dead*  
  
Yusuke: HA! THE SONG IS ALMOST OVER!  
  
Genkai: NO. do you think?  
  
Yusuke: as a matter of fact, I do.  
  
Youko: *is still being chased by Karasu*  
  
Karasu: *is still chasing Youko*  
  
-On the twelfth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me:  
  
Twelve koorime crying,  
  
Eleven sarcastic psychics,  
  
Ten bombs a blowing,  
  
Nine killer plants,  
  
Eight bakas a teasing,  
  
Seven cities a burning,  
  
Six swords a slicing,  
  
Five shot gun blasts,  
  
Four thieving demons,  
  
Three Keikos slapping,  
  
Two rose whips,  
  
and a Hiei stuck up in a tree.  
  
Kuwabara: *somehow came back to life*  
  
Koenma: Yo! I brought him back!  
  
Genkai: oh joy.  
  
Kuwabara: *hugs Yukina* don't cry, baby.  
  
Hiei: *is down from the tree because the song is over, and is VERY pissed because Kuwabara hugged Yukina* GET YOUR FRIKIN HANDS OFF MY SISTER! *slices Kuwabara in half*  
  
Yukina: you're my brother?  
  
Hiei: O_O oops. *runs for his life*  
  
Youko: *is at the top of a tree, hiding from Karasu*  
  
Karasu: oh, Kurama, where have you gone?  
  
Youko: I WILL NEVER GIVE IN TO YOU, YOU SICKO GAY HENTAI!  
  
Karasu: oh Kurama, that hurts my feelings.  
  
Youko: *makes the killer plant eat Karasu*  
  
Kuronue: *wakes up* huh? what? Occifer, I sweat to drunk I'm not god! *notices the teargems on the ground from Yukina* OOOOH SHINY!  
  
Jin: Hey, there, Urameshi!  
  
Yusuke: JIN?!?! What the hell are YOU doing here? The song is over!  
  
-So, on the day after Christmas, I had:  
  
Twelve koorime crying,  
  
Twenty-two sarcastic psychics,  
  
Thirty bombs a blowing,  
  
Thirty-six killer plants,  
  
Forty bakas a teasing,  
  
Forty-two cities a burning,  
  
Forty-two swords a slicing,  
  
Forty shot gun blasts,  
  
Thirty-six thieving demons,  
  
Thirty Keikos slapping,  
  
Twenty-two rose whips,  
  
and Twelve Hieis stuck up in twelve trees!  
  
Yusuke: NANI?!?!?! THE SONG STILL ISN'T OVER?!?!?  
  
Hiei: *is running away from Yukina*  
  
Yukina: *is chasing Hiei asking what he knew about her brother*  
  
Youko: *is asleep*  
  
Kuronue: *is admiring the teargems in his secret hideout in the makai*  
  
Genkai: *is sarcastically dissing everyone*  
  
Kuwabara: *is dead, AGAIN*  
  
Karasu: *is also dead*  
  
Koenma: *is doing a tremendous pile pf paperwork* Stamp? sure! Approval? sure! Appeal? sure! Come back from the dead? why not? (XD that really is from a YYH episode)  
  
Keiko: *is beating up Yusuke*  
  
-And the rest of the year I:  
  
Tried to make the twelve koorime crying to stop crying.  
  
Gave the twenty-two sarcastic psychics to Rando when they got on my nerves.  
  
Gave Karasu the thrity bombs a blowing so he could blow up my school.  
  
Made a greenhouse for Kurama with the thirty-six killer plants.  
  
Used the forty bakas a teasing to annoy Yusuke.  
  
Let the forty-two cities a burning burn, and let Hiei hang out in them.  
  
Gave the forty-two swords a slicing to Hiei.  
  
Used the forty shot gun blasts to BEAT THE TOGURO BROTHERS, KARASU, AND BUI TO BLOODY PULPS!  
  
Unleashed the thirty-six thieving demons into the spiritworld vault.  
  
Let the thirty Keikos slapping do their job on people I hate.  
  
Gave the twenty-two rose whips to Kurama.  
  
and Twelve Hieis stuck up in twelve trees...I kept them to myself. All to myself. Actually, I joined them up in the tree. XD  
  
~*~  
  
-Was it funny? Should I write one with bad guys, considering this was all good guys? (excluding Karasu)  
  
-PLEASE REVIEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! JUST CLICK THAT LITTLE BUTTON THAT SAYS "Go" AND TYPE SOMETHING! IT DOESN'T HAVE TO BE NICE, IT'S A REVIEW AND A REVIEW IS A REVIEW!  
  
-REMEMBER, I LIVE ON REVIEWS!  
  
-I'm sorry if people seemed OOC, I just wanted it to be funny.  
  
=PLEASE REVIEW! DON'T MAKE ME BEG!  
  
=Flames will be used to toast marshmallows.  
  
-Kuwa fans, don't flame cuz of the bashing. I warned you at the beginning.  
  
=I'M GOING TO START BEGGING IF YOU DON'T GO REVIEW! 


End file.
